16 May

Yesterday morning in a class, I forgot something very important.  I forgot that it’s not about me and it’s allllll about my students.  I try not to do that but I failed in that moment.  You see, the ladies were coming in later than usual – not as talkative – and the energy was very low.  I figured that when I turned on the music, the magic would happen and the room would come alive with energy and attitude.  Well, it didn’t happen – in fact, I wondered if anyone was there….I tried to engage them and was my typical crazy, energetic self….but to no avail.  During a pause between songs, I even commented on the low level of energy – i know, BAD instructor!!! The class continued and somehow we all survived.  One of my usual spunky girls was very quiet – I did take note when she came in that it appeared as if she had been crying.  She apologized on her way out for her lack of energy and I knew right then that I had failed as an instructor.  I quickly reassured her that all was well and that it was probably just my energy.  It was then that I noticed the splint on her fingers – I didn’t ask any questions but just had this feeling that something had happened to make her upset. 

I walked to my car and gave myself a much needed scolding.  Even though the energy was low of my class participants, at least they were there.  They could have stayed home – but they still chose to attend class….even if they couldn’t give 100%.  It’s not my job to judge them or try and change their circumstances.  It IS my job to encourage them – brighten their morning with a smile – and to be a ray of sunshine in their day.  It is NOT about me….it is allllll about them.  They should never leave my class and feel defeated and wish that they had stayed home. 

This is a confession I wish I didn’t need to make; however, I guess I needed to be reminded of what my job as an instructor really is – really, what my “job” as an individual is – every person who comes into my day should leave feeling happier, encouraged, motivated, and loved.

I promise to do better.


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